so, what are you doing for fun?
on learning to resist the Millennial Urge to monetize every hobby
#WednesdayWisdom
“I don't think you can create art out of anger; it has to come out of some form of understanding. You have to feel good about who you are and that you could do something to change things.” ~ Faith Ringgold
Morning Musings
At the end of 2019, I was meeting with my mastermind accountability group and after rattling off all of my goals for 2020 she said, “That’s all great. But what are you doing for fun?”
Reader, four years later I’m still trying to answer that question.
While many people found themselves baking bread during the height of lockdown, I decided to do virtual yoga teacher training. That was my “pandemic hobby.” I told myself I was looking to deepen my understanding of a practice I’d been doing on and off since college…and that’s partly true.
The other reason is that I was already mentally plotting my escape from my 9-to-5 at the time and becoming a certified yoga teacher seemed to be another revenue stream to add to freelance writing (and what do you know, four years later that training paid off and I am actually teaching yoga, yay!). Plus be the change you want to see in the world (in this case, more diverse yoga teachers) and all that jazz.
As a quintessential Enneagram 3 Achiever, I don’t really have a concept of fun. What is fun? I don’t know her. I do things to win (according to StrengthsFinder, competition is my greatest strength). I am very competitive. I enjoy achieving to my core. And it’s served me quite well…professionally.
Personally I’m still grappling with the concept of fun and resisting the Millennial Urge to monetize every hobby. I did it with reading (hello, author Q&As); pole dancing and Peloton (okay, not monetized, but definitely into the competitive side of it); and, most recently, yoga.
Admittedly, having a toddler to chase around does naturally lend itself to fun. Violet is obsessed with going outside at all times so I’ve found myself going down slides to small for my size-14 behind more often than not these days. Or stopping along a walk to literally smell the flowers and step on crunchy leaves. We dance. We sing. We play pretend. We color and draw. We ring around the Rosie every night before bed. We have fun. I think it’s impossible not to tap into your inner child when you’re spending quality time with a small child.
As the saying goes, “all work and no play makes Jane a dull girl.” I even have PLAY in bright yellow letters on my vision board, along with the quote “more fun, less stress.” So, what am I doing for fun these days?
I’m getting back into reading for fun (currently obsessed with Before I Let Go by Kennedy Ryan). I’m also contemplating starting a vinyl collection. I bought my first vinyl back in 2022 with the release of Beyoncé’s Renaissance album and I want to buy Cowboy Carter on vinyl, too (but I’m trying to wait until the standard one with the horse cover comes out so all three acts will look the same…assuming the third act also features a horse in some capacity.
Will I eventually get a turntable and actually play said vinyls, or keep them in their shrink wrap as collectors’ items? Only time will tell, though I do have fond memories of growing up and listening to my dad play Earth, Wind & Fire, Bob Marley and Marvin Gaye on his record player.
I’m also toying with the idea of starting a stamp collection (nerdy, I know). My dad gifted me with Toni Morrison’s stamps last year and I just saw in the USPS catalog (listen, I already told you I’m a nerd), that there are new sea turtle stamps coming out soon, which I’m really excited about. So maybe I’ll get a binder to put them all together. Who knows? For now I’m having fun (get it?) deciding what to do for fun.
If you have any suggestions, feel free to hit reply or leave a comment. Or, share what it is you do for fun and maybe you’ll inspire others to give it a try?
ICMYI
I recently talked to my fellow writer mom friend Terri Huggins at Motherly about pregnancy apps and the maternal mortality crisis. I’ve also had a pretty fun podcast run as of late:
Episode 49 of The Fearless Narratives podcast: I discussed the importance of amplifying Black women’s voices and more with host Courtlyn Jones.
Black Pod Class : Navigating the World of Podcasting As Black Women: I absolutely love chatting with students so I was thrilled to join Dr. Briana Barner’s class at University of Maryland to talk all things podcasting.
Finding Your Dopeness with Women Making Moves: I first met host Amy Pons at a networking dinner last summer and it was great to reconnect about breaking free of boxes that were never meant to serve us.
Upcoming Events
April 25: The Power Pivot: Motherhood, Career and Life As We Know It. Join The Society of Working Moms for a discussion on pivoting—in work life and in personal life, planned and unplanned—and finding inspiration in the redirection. Tickets are $25, but I’m giving away THREE free tickets to the first three people to reply to this newsletter and tell me about a pivot in your life!
April 27: Nurturing Nest: A Daytreat for Chicago Moms. I’m teaming up with my good friend Nia Ellis to provide a relaxing afternoon to Chicago-area moms (whether you’re trying to conceive, newly postpartum or many years postpartum). Join us for a restorative yoga practice led by Nia; meditation led by yours truly; and a soothing sound bath by Candyce Jones. Use the promo code LOREAL5 to save $5 on your ticket!
April 30: Soulful Expressions: Yoga & Poetry Fusion for Black Women's Wellness. I love collaborating with my friends to bring you all fun festivities, so I’m excited to partner with Sista Afya and my friend Pam R. Johnson Davis to deliver what promises to be a soulful and restorative evening in honor of National Black Women’s History Month and National Poetry month. It’s going to be a night to remember (and it’s FREE!).
Links I Love
My Miscarriage Was “Common” — For Black Women That Isn’t Comforting, It’s Terrifying (Refinery29) Content warning: This article contains graphic details of miscarriage, pregnancy loss, and the Black Maternal Health crisis.
There Is No Point in My Being Other Than Honest with You: On Toni Morrison’s Rejection Letters (Los Angeles Review of Books)
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You’ll see some of my pandemic hobby today, but honestly, I’m having fun dressing myself in my own clothes, making playlists and I’m doodling again!
I took struggle with fun. I started sewing and now sew for a local fabric shop and a pattern company... So I can get free fabric and free patterns (my way of making my hobby a little more sustainable 😂), and while I don't make any money from #makingitwithmich, I do enjoy posting any tidbits I think my help or engage on that Instagram. I *just* started listening to audiobooks for fun and relaxation and have devoured 4 books in 10 days!