Success doesn't have an expiration date 👵

Nov 14, 2018

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#WednesdayWisdom

"Gratitude can transform any situation. It alters your vibration, moving you from negative energy to positive. It's the quickest, easiest, most powerful way to effect change in your life." — Oprah

Morning Musings

Last week, I was visited by the Ghost of Christmas Past. Okay, not really. But following my keynote speech at ChickTech Chicago's networking event, a young woman introduced herself and told me how she was worried she was "running out of time."

Y'all, she was only 23. It took everything in me not to tell her, "but you're just a baby ... you have the rest of your life ahead of you!"

But I understood where she was coming from, because I've been there, too: constantly comparing yourself to your peers; sizing yourself up next to former classmates; wonder why you haven't made a #30Under30 list when everyone else you graduated with seems to make the cut.

I mean, hell, the latter is part of why I started going to therapy two years ago. And back when I was #InMyFeelings, I didn't want to hear the wise words from my mentor about these lists being glorified popularity contests.

But now I get it. Back in September, I nominated myself for a local nonprofit's #40Under40 (ain't no shame in my game) and also had a former honoree (thanks, Ashley!) nominate me for good measure.

Last month, I was invited to the Preview Day where the interviewed more than 60 women. Naively, I thought I had it in the bag -- I have the resume, the personality and the social media following. I was wrong.

My invitation to join this esteemed group of women never came, not even a "thanks, but no thanks." I was disappointed, but not devastated. Now, had this been two years ago, I would have been crushed.

At 31, I know there's more to life than lists. If I could tell my 23-year-old self anything, it would be not to get hung up on lists. Success does not have an expiration date. And your self-worth is not determined by accolades.

That's the advice I shared with the young woman, too, knowing full well they may land on deaf ears because hey, I get it, I was 23 once. But if I could have stopped obsessing over #30Under30 lists then, I could have saved myself a lot of tears, a lot of drama, and a lot of money in therapy bills.

Love,
L'Oreal

ICYMI

About that time Diddy (yes, Diddy) helped me get my WHOLE life together and develop a litmus test for saying "yes" in my latest for Shine ...

And, special thanks to Saya Hillman, for including my career coaching services in her 2018 Life of Yes List O' Gift Ideas ... the holidays will be here before you know it!

IRL

Jan. 9: I Can't: Land My Dream Job (Can't wait until January? Check out part 1, I Can't: Figure Out What I Want to Do With My Life with Sheila Devi on Dec. 3)

Links I Love

My Latest Obsession

When a fellow book nerd (hey, Heather!) recommended Pride by Ibi Zoboi, I was hooked. A modern-day telling of Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice, one of my favorite books of all-time, with Black and brown people? Yes, please!

And I have to say, it did NOT disappoint. I pretty much read the whole thing in a weekend. Yes, I'm a sucker for YA novels, but positioning the heroine as an Afro-Latina? I'm in love.

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