Why I'm swapping self-care for soul-care 💜
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#WednesdayWisdom
"Caring for myself is not self-indulgence, it is self-preservation, and that is an act of political warfare." — Audre Lorde
Morning Musings
There's more to self-care than face masks and bath bombs, but you wouldn't know it by looking at Instagram and all the #InternationalSelfCareDay posts, which is today, btw. Somewhere in the past few years, wellness became an industry and self-care became commodified and it all became too much.
What, then, is a Black girl to do? Rest, according to Tricia Hersey, founder of The Nap Ministry, a collective napping experience.
I first learned about her work during a leadership initiative for Black women and I've been intrigued ever since. So much so that I interviewed her for Shine to learn more about this radical notion of rest as resistance.
"Self-care has been co-opted. You go and buy expensive bath products, but when someone says take a nap, you feel guilty," she said. "There’s so much talk about self-care, but we can’t get to self-care until we get to some soul-care."
Since then, I've been shifting my approach to self-care toward more wholistic self-care. What this looks like for me is leaning more into my faith: actually going to church rather than live-streaming from the comfort of my couch; joining a Bible study; and listening to praise music in the morning.
It also looks like taking a nap when I feel like it and not feeling pressure to do all the things as though my self-worth is tied to how much I can produce.
And it looks like taking a restorative yoga class or going for an easy run (or, as reader Sarah K. calls it, a "sweaty meditation). Side note: I didn't realize how many of you are runners, thanks for welcoming me to the community and sharing your tips and encouragement, I feel the love!
And last, but not least, it looks like Wash Day on Sundays, deep conditioning my hair while wearing a face mask and listening to a long meditation (because hey, I'm still a millennial and I like nice things), and then twisting my hair while listening to Homecoming or Lizzo. (Or you could listen to my friend Aisha's Wash Day meditation on the Shine app).
My point is: you don't *need* all the things to practice self-care. Simply take time to do what makes your soul happy.
What does your soul-care look like? Hit "reply" and let me know!
Best,
L'Oreal
ICYMI
As some of you know, earlier this year I decided to do The Big Chop (aka cut off the relaxed parts of my hair). I'd been growing out an accidental pixie cut since 2017, wore my hair in protective styles all 2018 and decided to fully embrace my 'fro on Friday, February 15, 2019 -- the day after Valentine's Day as an act of self-love.
I pitched Kayla Greaves, fashion and beauty editor at Bustle, that following Monday and the rest, as they say, is history. Read all about my hair love journey in my first essay for Bustle and let me know what you think!
Cool Opps
July 27-28: Bossed Up Bootcamp in Chicago (use the promo code LTINTHECITY for 20% off...and check out my episode on the Bossed Up podcast talking about "balancing" a day job, side-hustle and relationships)
Links I Love
How selfies are helping trans people create their own narratives. The lineage of Black track stars setting records in acrylics (shout-out to Flo Jo). A last look at Ebony's archives before they're sold (fun fact: I used to work at Johnson Publishing Company and remember our team having to handle the delicate images with white gloves ... I can only hope the images find a permanent home where generations will be able to witness our history for years to come).
#31Daysto1K
Hey, hey! We are ONE weeks away from the end of the #1Daysto1K giveaway! This week, we're at 935 subscribers and if we reach 1,000 by July 31, one lucky winner will receive:
✨ A 15-minute consulation with me
✨ A $25 Starbucks gift card AND
✨ A copy of my fave personal development books: You Are a Badass and You Are a Badass at Making Money by Jen Sincero.
You're already on the list, so you're eligible. But be sure to share the love and tell your friends and family to subscribe here so we can reach that goal. Thanks in advance!
My Latest Obsession
So, if you didn't know, this newsletter is basically a Beyoncé stan account (and I'm only half-kidding). While the live-action version of The Lion King left a bit to be desired (tbh, I had a hard time not getting in formation after Beyoncé's Nala asked, "Lions, are you with me?"), but The Lion King: The Gift companion album is exactly that, a gift.
A few fellow BeyHive members and I were in utter awe that the Queen herself gifted us with not one, but TWO albums in one year. And, okay, you could make the argument that Homecoming: The Live Album doesn't really count, but in that case, we're not friends. #SorryNotSorry
I've long admired Bey's propensity to use her worldwide platform to shed light on Black artists and this album is no exception.
Now Hiring
Senior Director, Content and Communications for University of Chicago
Human Assets Associate for the Obama Foundation
Literary Activism and Engagement Program Manager for PEN America
Major Gifts Officer for Higher Achievement
Indigenous Justice Organizer for ACLU South Dakota
Media Fellow (Editorial) for TEDx
Assistant Culture Editor at Her Campus Media
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