a season of overwhelm 😩

Spread the love, forward to a friend!

View this email in your browser

#WednesdayWisdom

"i vow to give myself the love, the respect, the goodness that i deserve so that every other relationship i experience is an overflow of everything i chosen to give myself." — anisah amat

Morning Musings

Perhaps my favorite part about traveling to Cuba earlier this month (blog post to come, I promise!) was being disconnected (much to the chagrin of our families).

Sure, enterprising Cubanos attempted to lure tourists into restaurants and other establishments with the promise of free Wifi, a luxury on the Caribbean island, but I wasn't buying it -- literally and figuratively.

Being free from the pings of emails, DMs and text messages was one of the reasons I'd booked the trip in the first place. Besides, you know, celebrating Jeff's 35th birthday and all that jazz.

The chance to unplug is the reason cruises, camping and even my family's annual spring break trip to the Outer Banks have become places of refuge for me. There's just something about switching on that Out of Office reply and being out of sync with the outside world. It's a feeling I've come to crave.

As soon as we touched down in Fort Lauderdale, I dreaded taking my phone off airplane mode. Instantly, I was bombarded with close to 100 text messages -- and that was before I even had a chance to glimpse at my inbox, which I just caught up with this past weekend.

Since we've returned, I've been feeling a huge sense of overwhelm -- from work to personal projects and everything in between. These recent events have me longing for a simpler time ... before smartphones, before apps, before juggling two out-of-control Gmail calendars, one for work, one for life -- both anxiety-inducing.

Before Chicago, I didn't have quite so many coffee dates and networking events on my calendar. Lately, I've been dreaming about moving to the 'burbs and ... just being. Somewhere with a proper parking space (whether it's a garage or driveway) with no upstairs neighbor -- a single-family home to raise our future family.

It's all a pipe dream for now, but that doesn't mean ya girl can't fantasize. In the meantime, I'm going to work on carving out more white space on my calendars. Over the past year or so, I've gotten really good at saying "no" to events, but now the real challenge comes in saying "no" to people, as well meaning as most of them are.

As a perpetual people-pleaser and goody-two shoes, I dread the thought of someone being unhappy with me or my actions. But, in the words of Beyoncé, I'm a grown woman, and it's time I start acting as such and putting myself and my needs above the comfort and needs of others.

Love,
L'Oreal

Links I Love

On mourning the loss of a friend, and how relationships never die. Why talking out loud to a deceased loved one is good for your mental health. Roxane Gay paying homage to Toni Morrison in only the way that she can do (yes, this Black girl writer is in utter awe). Why white women's feminism is more toxic than they realize.

My Latest Obsession

I've got a confession to make ... I'm not a *huge* podcast person. I prefer to consume information by reading (so old school, I know). But, when I do listen to the occasional podcast, I like them with a heavy dose of Black feminism.

Enter Go Off, Sis. In the first episode, the Black editors behind Unbothered, Refinery29's sub-brand for Black women, discuss the origins and parameters of Hot Girl Summer. It sounds like someone was eavesdropping on a convo of me and my homegirls, and I love it.

Now Hiring

1. Director of Digital Crisis Services for The Trevor Project

2. Communications Associate for Advance Illinois

3. Chief Equity and Inclusion Officer for Loyola University Maryland

4. Grant Writer for Surge Institute 

5. Manager of Corporate and Foundation Relations for One Million Degrees

6. Staff Editor for the New York Times

7. Director of Communications for Mothers Out Front

8. Director of People & Culture for Resilience

Psst...did a friend forward you this newsletter? Subscribe here so you never miss an issue! Liked what you read? Be sure to follow using the buttons below.