Inhale the goodness, exhale the bullsh*t 🙏
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#WednesdayWisdom
"'I love myself.' the quietest. simplest. most powerful. revolution. ever." — Nayyirah Waheed
Morning Musings
Breathe in through your nose.
Exhale through your mouth.
I lost track of how many times I heard these instructions during the course of last weekend at the annual fall Starshine & Clay yoga retreat for women of color. It was my second time at the retreat -- a life-changing and soul-affirming experience I documented in my first essay for ZORA.
Simple instructions, but ones that are oft ignored in the busyness of the world. Heck, I even ignore my Apple Watch's reminders to breathe, which interestingly seem to come at the times I need to exhale the most. My friend Sierra and I are convinced the reminders are somehow connected to our blood pressure.
Last week, I was doing the absolute most with the very least, as I'm wont to do. After a full day of back-to-back meetings, I decided it would be a great idea to write this newsletter AND build a presentation for a speaking engagement the next day.
And in case you're wondering, yes, I do exhaust myself sometimes. Most times, if we're being honest (and I'm being honest).
I took to Twitter as I often do to voice my frustrations and was met with a chorus of tweets from both online and IRL friends reminding me that I do not, in fact, need to do it all.
But one tweet in particular from Sophia S. stood out: "If you do less, you are not less."
My mind was BLOWN.
The irony is that earlier that day I'd led my team in an exercise around our various strengths and we discussed what it looked like when we were operating in the balcony (light) or basement (darkness) of our respective strengths.
I quickly realized I was operating in the darkness. Ambition isn't a dirty word. But like any superpower, it can be harnessed for good or evil. I wouldn't be where I am today without my drive, but also...to what end, and more importantly, at what cost? And the real question: is it even worth it?
Someone recently tweeted: "if God granted you everything you desired, would you have space for it?" I knew my answer was a resounding no. Seriously, if you ever want to give yourself a mild panic attack, take a look at my calendars.
So I'm reevaluating some goals, reprioritizing commitments and making literal and figurative space for the people and things that matter to me.
On top of Bald Mountain this weekend, surrounded by 45 other women of color, I wrote a sankalpa, or "an intention formed by the heart and mind." It reads:
I can say no.
I will do less.
I must protect my energy.
Breathe in the goodness, babes. And exhale the bullshit.
Love,
L'Oreal
Cool Opps
Recently, I chatted with Javacia Harris Bowser, the founder of See Jane Write, about all things freelancing, pitching and balancing a side-hustle with your full-time job. If you're ready to kickstart your freelance writing career, be sure to sign up for her all-new See Jane Freelance e-course. Use the promo code LTCITY19 to save 25%. But hurry, enrollment ends Oct. 1!
IRL
Sept. 25 (aka TONIGHT): Homecoming: Back to the Hustle. Join me at the first fundraiser hosted by Prismatic's Associate Board. Use the promo code LOREAL5OFF to save $5. See you there!
Links I Love
How to set boundaries with your anxious friend. What it's like to be multiracial in America. The evolution of Bitch Media, as told by EIC Evette Dionne. How "hangry" came to be part of our everyday lexicon. The spiritual healing practices of our ancestors. Why sisterhood doesn't always mean solidarity.
My Latest Obsession
'Tis the season for holiday gatherings. Whether's you're hosting a Halloween-inspired shindig, Friendsgiving or a holiday brunch, there are a ton of different ways to get the word out.
There are few things I love more than a themed-party. Well, there are some things, like Beyoncé, the color purple (the actual color, not the movie. Don't @me), and pumpkin-flavored everything. But themed parties rank high up on the list.
For my Harlem Renaissance-themed Golden Birthday three years ago, I scoured Paperless Post for the perfect invite. After all, a creative invitation sets the tone and feel for your get-together, so guests know what to expect before they've arrived. Plus, the app makes it super easy to track RSVPs on the go.
And while I don't have any parties on the book yet, I'm excited to try the site's new Flyers feature, which lets you send customizable mobile-friendly invites complete with GIFs, which you all know I love. Let the partying commence!
(FYI, this is a sponsored post, which means I received compensation for this review, but opinions are my own!)
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