all of the women in me are tired 😣

Jun 03, 2020

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#WednesdayWisdom

"Being Black is not exhausting. *Oppression* is. Being Black is a blessing, and I will treat it as such." — Brittany Packnett Cunningham

Morning Musings

Yesterday, for the first time in my 12-year career, I called out Black. Friends and I have often talked about doing so, and this time I did it. I had to, for my own well-being.

I remember first hearing about calling out Black the summer of 2016 in the wake of the back-to-back murders of Alton B. Sterling and Philando Castile at the hands of police officers.

At the time, I was the sole Black girl on the marketing and communications team for a nonprofit for girls. I remember feeling sick to my stomach and longing for the days when I worked at Johnson Publishing, home of JET and EBONY, where I was surrounded by people who "got it."

Fast forward four years and that part hasn't changed. I'm still the sole Black girl on the marketing and communications team, this time at an education nonprofit. And while we're certainly more diverse and "woke," if you will, we're not without our faults.

As I shared during our team meeting on Monday, it's a difficult place to be in -- grieving and hurting as a Black woman and being on the team responsible for the messaging. I do not and still don't have the words. And so I graciously leaned out.

I recognize the privilege there. I've been at this for some time and I'm at a point in my career where I can say no and push back without fear of consequences. I also happen to have an understanding manager and work for an organization committed to diversity, equity and inclusion.

I'm also at a place in my own journey where I feel comfortable and confident in advocating for myself and others. The L'Oreal of 2016 would have never done the above ... the L'Oreal of 2020 is doing so to make it easier for the next Black girl. It is a responsibility I do not take lightly.

And even with all of that there's still the emotional labor of being a Black person in the workplace. It's exhausting af. Yesterday, after working for an hour, I realized I can't "self-care" my way out of this. I can't push my way through like I normally do.

So I logged off. I laid down and I took a nap. Because rest is a form of resistance, too, my friends. Black people are tired. Black women are tired. Black women who are the only ones on their teams, in their departments, in their companies are TIRED. More on that here.

As poet Nayyirah Waheed wrote and the subject line of this email indicates, "all of the women in me are tired." Just so, so tired.

Love,
L'Oreal

Virtual Happenings

June 3: Coping with COVID. A free 60-minute online training hosted by Women Unite with practical tips on how to manage your mental health during a global pandemic.

June 5: Girls Write Now's History in the Making Series. Bestselling author Kiley Reid of Such a Fun Age talks about amplifying diverse voices. Suggested donation $20.

June 9: The Memo Book Club. Join host Dr. Nika White and author Minda Harts for a discussion about her bestselling book, The Memo: What Women of Color Need to Know About Securing a Seat at the Table. $25

June 15: Mind Mapping 101. Learn how to use Mind Mapping to fuel your entrepreneurial success with Kare Spears, founder of Kareracter Creative Studio. $10

Links I Love

1. Remember. No One is Coming to Save Us. Roxane Gay does it again. (New York Times)

2. Your Black Colleagues May Look Like They're Okay -- Chances Are They're Not. The part about working with Amy Coopers and being afraid when your husband leaves the house really got to me. (Refinery 29)

3. The Four Bodies: A Holistic Toolkit for Healing for Coping with Racial Trauma. Because Black mental health and wellness matters. (Nappy Head Club)

My Latest Obsession

While I never watched The Adventures of an Awkward Black Girl web series, I did read the book and have been in love with Issa Rae ever since.

This weekend, Jeff and I watched Lovebirds as part of date night on Saturday (because yes, #BlackLove matters, too, even in this midst of *gestures widely* all of this) and, per our usual Sunday routine, watched the latest episode of Insecure.

Safe to say, I'm here for all things Issa. Catch her on the cover of the latest issue of CRWN mag while you're at it and support Black creatives.

Now Hiring

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