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#WednesdayWisdom

"Get calm and the right answers come." — Lalah Delia

Morning Musings

Lately, like many of us, I have been feeling all the feels. Which is appropriate because I just submitted an article about the Feelings Wheel, a tool my therapist recommended a while back. Let's just say it's come in handy these last few weeks.

This past Saturday started off fine enough. I was finally able to sleep in (unlike the previous weekend when my upstairs neighbor woke me up at 6 a.m.) and Jeff brought back quiche from my favorite coffee shop on his way home from golfing.

Then he asked if I'd seen Chrissy Teigen's tweet about their third pregnancy. I had not. Given her candidness around using IVF for Luna and Miles, I assumed the third kid had been conceived that way as well. I was wrong. According to Teigen, the third pregnancy was unplanned. 

For reasons I can't fully explain, that disclosure felt a bit like a punch to the gut. To be clear, I'm rooting for Chrissy and John. They are literally #CoupleGoals, and because of their infertility journey, had also become #IVFGoals for me as well. 

And now I felt a bit betrayed, a tad jealous, and a lot of anger although not toward Chrissy and John, but our own situation. Of course, I'm happy for them, not that my opinion matters, they don't know me. But I couldn't help but notice people are on their second and third kids -- both celebrities and IRL friends -- while we were still patiently (well, more so impatiently for me) waiting for one.

That on top of the fact I've seen several people tweet about their second books/book deals and again I'm like "hey, yo, God, can I get ONE?! Preferably one of each -- a baby AND a book. But I'll take one, either one. Your call, it's cool."

Needless to say, my prayer has not been answered between Saturday and today. But that's okay. I put my Big Girl Panties on as my friend Myla says and allowed myself to feel the feels instead of rushing through them or trying to suppress them like I typically do.

In a virtual happy hour with my friends CeCe and Shanea, I told them how I'd try to plan for grief the Saturday before Mother's Day and how that blew up in my face come actual Mother's Day. As it turns out, you can't schedule feelings. They come when they want and leave when they're ready. You can't rush it, just feel it.

Love,
L'Oreal

ICYMI

To paraphrase Beyoncé Giselle Knowles-Carter, I've been writing, I've been writing. Here's where my byline has appeared recently:

• Peloton's Chelsea Jackson Roberts Embodies #BlackGirlMagic On and Off the Mat. In my latest for Well + Good, I interviewed my favorite yoga instructor.

• Why I Chose to Invest in Nail Health During a Pandemic. If you've been subscribing for a while, you know how much I love Ezza, a nail salon here in Chicago that believes in empowering women on both sides of the table.

I've also been featured in a couple of places as well:

• Underrepresented: The Undeniable Link Between Race and Diagnosis, Treatment, and Wellness. My Internet friend Aisha Beau Johnson interviewed me in her latest for PsyCom.

• "I'm Still Unlearning": Black Creators and Mental Well-Being In Times of Crisis. Subscriber Micheal Jones interviewed me for an issue of his newsletter, The Supercreator.

Cool Opps

Aug. 20: #L2LChat. Join me and fellow writer Brittney Oliver of Lemons 2 Lemonade on Instagram Live at 5:30 CT for a candid conversation about freelance writing. (FREE)

Aug. 28: Sugaberry Presents: Milk & Suga. A day of virtual programming dedicated to celebrating, educating and empowering Black moms on their breastfeeding journey. (FREE)

Aug. 28: Mind Mapping to Heal From Impostor Syndrome. And another one featuring yours truly, this time in collaboration with Vanessa Flowers of Flower Girls Meet and Karen Spears of Kareacter Creative Studio. (FREE)

Links I Love

1. How Social Justice Slideshows Took Over Instagram. Raise your hand if you've shared a few of these (FYI: I'm raising both hands). (Vox)

2. Am I Being Set Up to Fail? As the author writes, the season of check-in texts from well-meaning white folks is over and Black women are left once again to save America. But who's going to save us? (The Cut)

3. Hennything Is Possible: How the French Cognac Found a Home in the Black Community I'll be honest, I've never had Hennessy, but I love reading this history of the beloved drink. (Medium)

My Latest Obsession

You know you're obsessed when the neighborhood coffee shop tags you in a picture of its quiche because you ask about/order it so much. Shout-out to The Common Cup, a Black-owned coffee shop in Rogers Park. If you want a special treat, try their Almond Burr, an iced latte with cinnamon, almond syrup and vanilla syrup.

Now Hiring

1. Senior Editor for Rolling Stone

2. Social Media Coordinator for The Everygirl

3. Community Engagement Resident for Chicago Sun-Times

4. Staff Writer, News for The Root

5. Creative Development Specialist, Live for TikTok

6. Director of Race Diversity, Equity & Inclusion for StriveTogether

7. Junior Manager, Social Media for PUMA

8. Marketing Communications Associate for San Francisco Bicycle Coalition

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