getting back on the pole
reclaiming the gift of pole fitness
#WednesdayWisdom
“I am worthy of living a life that is bold, audacious, courageous, and full of joy.” ~ Chasity Cooper
Morning Musings
This past weekend I did something I haven’t done in years—I attended my first pole class since my local pole studio closed back in 2016. In the Before Times (pre-Peloton, pre-pandemic and pre-pregnancy) I was all about that #PoleLife. Fun fact: I was even unanimously voted Miss Congeniality in a regional pole competition hosted by my home studio in Baltimore. Exhibit A:
In fact, finding a new home studio was one of the first things I did when I moved to Chicago 10 years ago. I first fell in love with pole fitness shortly after graduating college. My friend Brenda and I were looking for something to do, I’d suggested pole after attending another friend’s bachelorette party and the rest is history.
Besides being a fun, full-body workout, I love that both studios I attended were geared toward women only. I’ve gone to traditional gyms, but don’t exactly love being surrounded by #GymBros (you know the ones). Xpose Fitness and Flirty Girl Fitness were my home away from home. Safe sanctuaries where I could literally prance around in my skivvies and not worry about being catcalled (okay, maybe there was some catcalling, but in the form of loving encouragement from the other women in the studio). These gyms were home to body positivity before it became a thing. And you could find everyone from college students to grandmas twerking it out on a Tuesday night—I’m not kidding!
But best of all was the self-love these studios exuded and helped me embody. With the lights low and my booty shorts, I could feel myself transforming into Beyoncé or Rihanna.
So when Flirty Girl closed, I was devastated. I hadn’t just lost a workout, I’d lost a community. I found some of that with Peloton’s #BlackGirlMagic group, but that’s largely virtual and it’s not quite the same.
This year, I made a promise to myself to get back into the studio. Last month, I took a dance class with one of my favorite former Flirty Girl instructors. We learned a sultry routine to Sam Smith and Kim Petras’ “Unholy” and it was so fun (even if I was sore for the next several days).
Last weekend, I hosted my (belated) Galentine’s Day Pole Party with four other badass women and it. was. EVERYTHING! The vibes were immaculate and I had a blast. I can’t do all the tricks I used to do, but that didn’t matter. Standing in front of a full-length mirror in my bra and booty shorts I felt a sense of coming home—both to dance and to my body.
A lot has changed since 2016 (understatement of the century), but returning to the pole felt familiar, safe and hella fun. And returning as a mom? I was proud of me, not only for taking the time out to do something for myself, but for taking one more step toward finally embracing this postpartum body—curves, stretch marks, FUPA and all!
What have you done for yourself lately? When/where do you feel at home? Have you ever tried pole dancing? Let me know in the comments!
ICMYI
No doubt it’s hard out here for parents, but new research suggests that working moms have it especially hard—with 42% of working moms reporting they were diagnosed with anxiety and/or depression in 2022. Learn more in my latest for Fortune.
Links I Love
How ADHD Makes Natural Hair Care Hard for Black Women (Refinery 29)
How to Escape ‘Faux Self-Care’ (New York Times)
What Would a White Woman Do? (YES! Magazine)
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ah l’oreal i love this so much! you inspire me to write about my pole journey.
Last week I signed up for a subscription to a dance fitness studio in Atlanta after years of being away from regular dance classes. Glad we're getting back to it!