#WednesdayWisdom
“Reminder: your small wins matter. Don’t forget to celebrate them. You’re allowed to be proud of yourself.” ~ Alex Elle
Morning Musings
And just like that, the book tour for Stop Waiting for Perfect is over. We kicked off the celebration at Cafe con Libros in Brooklyn with my girl Aisha Beau the night before the official launch and wrapped last Friday at Barbara’s Bookstore in the suburbs of Chicago … and what a whirlwind month it’s been!
If I’m being honest, I'm sad that it’s over. As many of you’ve heard either on tour or in podcast interviews, I first had the idea for a book back in 2015. That idea, The Millennial Manual, later evolved into Trust Your Dopeness, which I wrote the book proposal for in 2017.
Fast forward to 2021 and I’ve finally signed an actual, factual book deal (after a few stops and starts on the literary agent side) and in 2022 we found out that a major global conglomerate owned the copyright to Trust Your Dopeness, so we changed the title to Stop Waiting for Perfect. Then in summer 2023, after several rounds of drafts and revisions, a book (and, therefore, an author) was born.
When I say this moment has been a long time coming, I mean that. When I tell you it was a labor of love, I mean that, too. As I wrote in the acknowledgement section, writing a book is hard. Writing a book during a global pandemic is harder. And writing a book during a global pandemic while pregnant and then later grappling with postpartum depression is hands down the hardest thing I’ve ever done, both personally and professionally.
So I meant it at each tour stop when I thanked you all for coming out. One of my greatest fears as a debut author was showing up to an empty room and that didn’t happen. Y’all made sure that didn’t happen and for that, I am grateful. You spent your time, your effort and your hard-earned money in helping me make my author dreams come true, and I appreciate you for that.
There was a point when I didn’t think a tour was going to happen at all because no one was responding to our inquiries and I get it—taking a chance on a relatively unknown author is pretty risky business, especially in this economy. I wasn’t sure how the tour was going to shape out, but at one point I decided to let go and let God (and Jennifer, my amazing publicist) and we did it!
I’ve got a few more virtual and in-person events lined up this fall, but there’s just something special about meeting you all in a bookstore or library, having a conversation and signing your books—a real pinch-me moment for sure.
So where do we go for here? Well, first I rest. Book #2 is already in the works (more on that later) and I’m in the very beginning stages of writing the proposal for the next book (any guesses on what it might be about?).
In the meantime, I’m still very much available to speak at your company or school (either in person or virtually!) and we’ve got a complementary workbook/book club guide coming, so stay tuned!
If you haven’t gotten your copy yet, I encourage you to scroll down and get the print or audiobook version (or put it on hold at your local library). And if you’ve had the chance to read or listen, please leave a review wherever you purchased your copy.
The book tour may be over, but my ✨author era✨ is just beginning. Thank you for being along for the ride!
Stop Waiting for Perfect is Out Now!
Upcoming Events
I’m excited to share that I’ll be leading a workshop on how to stop waiting for perfect at Diaspora Day by Embodied Black Girl this Friday, Sept. 22. This is a gathering that celebrates the beauty and the brilliance of the African diaspora. It’s a space where we dream new worlds and embody our ancestors’ wildest dreams. The festival takes place online and it’s 100% free…will you join us?
ICYMI
Although the book tour has ended, the press tour is still going strong. I recorded six (!) podcast interviews within the last week that will be making their way to your earbuds soon. But in the meantime, you can catch up on some of my articles about how pain inequity impacts Black Americans and the strategy this neuroscientist and mom of four uses to be a happier parent.
Also, I was interviewed for these stories about book blurbs and the reality of trying to get pregnant (spoiler: it’s not always as easy as we’ve been made to believe).
Links I Love
Adorable Little Detonators (The Cut): Now, to be clear, I don’t love the actual article as much as I love the conversations I’ve had with my childfree friends about it. Should we write a retort? Healthy relationships between friends who have kids and friends who don’t have kids do exist, y’all!
Victoria Monét on How a Difficult Birth Influenced Her New Album, ‘Jaguar II’ (SELF): I have my friend Anuli to thank for putting me on to Ms. Monét a few years ago and I have been blasting “On My Mama” ever since it dropped. This is one interview I wish I’d written myself.
20 Years of Pumpkin Spice Power (NPR): If you read last week’s newsletter, then you know how much I love pumpkin spice everything (except pie. Sweet potato is infinitely better. I will not be taking questions at this time). So it was fun to listen to history behind the phenomenon in this episode of It’s Been a Minute.
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Thank You
A special thank-you to April, Cait, Amanda, Harleen, Megan, Najja, Jessica, Priti, Cat, Jenna, Mallory, Rachel, Angel, Sarah, Camesha, Vix, Anna, Stephanie, Dominique, Tiffany, Emily, Mabinty, Lindsey, Casey, Lynnae, Dani and Amanda for becoming paid subscribers and helping to fuel this newsletter. I truly appreciate your support!
Left my review on Amazon just now! 🙌🏽 Also following you there so I know when to preorder the next book. 😁😁
I read a good 3/4 of the Cut article and I had to quit. I tried, I really tried.
Dear author: from one childless woman to another, you are insufferable. I can’t imagine thinking this way about my friends with kids.