things I did instead of working during my summer sabbatical

because life is better when you're having fun with the ones you love

#WednesdayWisdom

“You’re not behind. Go at your own pace. All things in time.” ~ Nneka M. Okona

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Morning Musings

Photo by Toni Cuenca on Unsplash

Welp, as predicted I did not get to even half of my summer sabbatical to-do list … and I’m okay with it. No, really. Here’s a brief roundup of all the things I did for fun instead of doing work during my break:

• Flew to Baltimore to celebrate my friend’s baby shower

• Ran through the sprinkler with my dad and Violet while playing soccer

• Ate crabs 🦀

• Went to library story time at the planetarium with my parents and Violet

• Ate (a lot of) ice cream 🍦

• Saw Inside Out 2 with my sister (the first one is better, IMO)

• Bought a Stanley Cup (don’t judge)

• Enjoyed a Perfect Chicago Day with my friend Marissa, complete with lunch at Monteverde, ice cream at Jenni’s and a cookie (for me) from Levain Bakery

• Chased after Violet at soccer

• Went to the farmers market

• Did the Lil’ Jon Peloton ride (WHAT?! YEAAA!)

• Started watching season three of The Bear (and I wholeheartedly agree with this GQ writer that it should be a weekly series)

• Went to a neighbor’s birthday party

• Rode my bike to meet Pam for kombucha

• Took a road trip to Ohio for the Fourth of July weekend

• Met up with friends for dinner and more friends for brunch

• Went on a date with Jeff

• Watched Supacell with my mother-in-law (I thought it was going to be a romcom based on the clip Strong Black Lead shared on Instagram, but alas, I was wrong. Very wrong!)

Now that’s not to say it was all fun. There was the four-hour flight delay at BWI. The water rescue that took place at the same beach as the birthday party. And I managed to break my new website, fixed it, then broke it again (it was plan to unveil to you my new branding and so forth and so on, but … life happens).

A year ago not completing every single task on my wildly ambitious to-do list would’ve sent me into a spiral. I would’ve felt like a failure (even though I set myself up for failure with unrealistic expectations).

These days, I’m extending myself a lot more grace and compassion. I’m giving myself permission to enjoy life and soak up the little moments, because that is precisely what life is composed of—tiny, little pockets of joy. And I’m learning to savor them when they happen.

My business coach

Jenni Gritters

named it so eloquently in her latest newsletter for

The Third Door

about realigning priorities:

This is what it looks like to have a life-first business: My work is at the bottom of the list. It still matters to me very much (it’s still a priority!) but when my business is thriving, it’s typically because the rest of the list of in order.

Life. First.

In the post, Jenni encourages readers to make their own list and, because we’re similar in many regards, my list is very similar to hers:

1. My faith (reading my devotionals religiously; carving out time to pray; attending church in person when we can)

2. Myself (my mental, physical, emotional and spiritual well-being; tending to my creativity; treating myself to a massage; spending quality time with myself)

3. My marriage (spending quality time together and having conversations that don’t resolve around work, household matters and/or childcare)

4. My daughter (making sure I spend quality, focused time with her; giving her my full attention; tending to her needs)

5. My village (spending quality time—whether in person or virtual—with my family of origin, extended family and friends who are like family)

6. My work (tending to the business at hand, but also carving out dedicated time to plan, evaluate and pivot, if need be)

7. My community (giving back to causes I care about; getting involved in local organizations; supporting local businesses, etc.)

For longer than I’d care to admit my priorities have been all out of sorts—with work often coming first; Violet coming next; and everything else pretty much falling to the wayside. I’m aiming to do a better job of keeping my priorities in check for the second half of the year.

Tell me what’s on your list of priorities in the comments!

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ICYMI

In my latest for Expectful, I shared my birth story and how Violet being born to Beyoncé (specifically Brown Skin Girl) was a full circle moment.

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Upcoming Events

• August 4: I’m collaborating with Three Avenues Bookshop here in Chicago to bring you a very special event! I’ll be leading a yoga and guided meditation session inspired by Stop Waiting for Perfect followed by a Q&A and book signing. See you there?

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What I’m Reading

• The Unfiltered Charm of Jet’s Beauties of the Week (The New Yorker)

• Tomi Adeyemi Says Goodbye to Orïsha (ELLE)

• Sound On: A Conversation About Queer Birth and Motherhood (by my writer mom friend & subscriber

  Victoria Marin
  of
  Feast and Famine
  )

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Now Hiring

1. Freelance Social Media Editor for The Honey Pot

2. Care Coordinator for Free Root Operation

3. Assistant Editor for Marie Claire

4. Director of Communications for Chicago Foundation for Women

5. Social Media Manager for Brooklyn Magazine

6. Podcast Host for ICYMI

7. Communications Coordinator for Foodwise

8. Director, Strategy & Communications at The Women's Equality Center

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Summer Colors Are In!

Have you checked out the latest Stop Waiting for Perfect merch? New colors and youth sizes are now available!

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Thank You

A special thank-you to April, Jeff, Carol, Cait, Amanda, Harleen, Megan, Najja, Jessica, Priti, Cat, Jenna, Mallory, Rachel, Angel, Sarah, Camesha, Vix, Anna, Stephanie, Dominique, Tiffany, Emily, Mabinty, Lindsey, Casey, Lynnae, Dani, Amanda, Raina, Abigail, Sharon, Kristen, Heather, Renae, Jennie, Brittaney, Kyndall, Sarah, Cecilia, Jessica, Kimberly, Jessica, Ean and Laur for becoming paid subscribers and helping to fuel this newsletter. I truly appreciate your support! 💜

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