you deserve a vacation
put on that OOO and go!
#WednesdayWisdom
“You are free to embrace the ebb and flow of each day.” ~ Morgan Harper Nichols
Morning Musings
As I’m writing this, there are literally fireworks going off right and left outside of our condo, which is making it hard for me to concentrate. But nevertheless, I persisted!
It’s officially #SummertimeChi (arguably the best season here) and I’ve been thinking a lot about vacation. I’m sure by now y’all have read the articles about Americans not using all their PTO and, honestly, I can’t relate.
With roughly 20 days to spread across immediate family in three states, our vacation days and long weekends are typically accounted for long before the year even starts rolling. Throw in a book tour on top of that this year (!!) and well, it’s a lot to juggle. Oftentimes, we find ourselves needing a vacation from our vacation because let’s be real, a vacation with a toddler isn’t exactly a relaxing-while-sipping-piña-coladas-poolside-in-a-string-bikini kinda vacation (although if yours are, more power to you!).
Recently one of my mom friends took a solo trip to Disney World and texted me while she was there to say “we need to normalize momcations!” My immediate thought? Yes, yes we do!
I’ve only taken one solo vacation thus far (to celebrate my 30th birthday) and it was life-changing. As an extrovert, I love spending time with other people so it was difficult at first for me to sit in relative silence and be still with my own thoughts and emotions. In fact, I cried—no, more like sobbed—the first day I was there. But I eventually found my way.
Now, as a mom, I sometimes crave that kind of peace and solitude. To be fair, Jeff did gift me a solo staycation at our favorite Chicago hotel for Mother’s Day last year so that I could finish whatever draft of the book I was working on at the time, but I’ve yet to cash in on that offer.
As the work conference, #SisterTrip to Vegas and wedding weekend proved, time away from the baby is good for everyone. And even if you’re not raising a tiny human, taking time away from everyday life, work and other responsibilities is important—whatever that looks like for you. For me, that was a a five-star spa vacation in Santa Fe. For my friend Deb, it was Disney.
Where do you want to go? What’s stopping you? How can you make your dream vacation a reality, or at least create something somewhat resembling it? Sure, Tuscany may not be in the cards (or the budget) this year, but perhaps Napa is an option or an afternoon at a nearby winery?
Too often we wait for the perfect circumstances to align and, well, I hate to break it you, but there’s no perfect time to take a break (pun intended). Your family will always need you. Your work will always need you. But guess what, you will always need you most.
So take your time, take your PTO, set that OOO (even if your home is your office and/or you’re not technically leaving town) and GO! Get outside. Touch some grass. Eat some ice cream. Treat yourself! You deserve.
Links I Love
Missy’s Midas Touch (Essence)
What the Fat-Shamers Don’t Get About Lizzo (Washington Post)
My Latest Obsession
If you’ve been anywhere on the internet the last couple of weeks, then you’ve no doubt seen the viral TikToks from Flyana Boss, a hip-hop duo consisting of Bobbi Lanea from Detroit and Folayan Kunerede from Dallas. Try not to get their catchy track “You Wish” stuck in your head. I double dog dare you.
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See You on (Book) Tour!
Below is a list of book events so far, more to come!
Monday, Aug. 14: Cafe con Libros in Brooklyn, NY
Thursday, Aug. 17: Ama La Vida (virtual)
Thursday, Aug. 17: Women & Children First in Chicago, IL
Friday, Aug. 18: Lululemon in Chicago, IL
Thursday, Aug. 24: Evanston Public Library in Evanston, IL (register here!)
Sept. 5: Curious Iguana in Frederick, MD
Sept. 14: Barbara’s Bookstore in Lombard, IL (register here!)
Thank You
A special thank-you to April, Cait, Amanda, Harleen, Megan, Najja, Jessica, Priti, Cat, Jenna, Mallory, Rachel, Angel, Sarah, Camesha, Vix, Anna, Stephanie, Dominique, Tiffany, Emily, Mabinty and Lindsey for becoming paid subscribers and helping to fuel this newsletter. I truly appreciate your support!
the sob during the beginning of a solo trip is so necessary to the fun you’ll have alone!
All the PTO definitely gets used. A week vacation with the kids in the summer (usually a trip to bestie's farm in NC) and the week between Christmas and New year's (kids are off from school and we use it as family togetherness time). Random mental health days and date days where we both take off the same day and go on a date since the kids are in school and we don't have to get a sitter (plus then we have a full 8 hours rather than a 2 or 3 hour outting at night when we are both tired), etc... All the PTO is done lol.